Sep 11

Written By

The Daily Guru Team

How do you start to feel desirable again when it’s been so so long since you last felt that way?


Feeling good about yourself and feeling desired in your relationship starts with knowing what makes you feel attractive. If you’re not sure where to start, then this article is for you!!
You may be saying to yourself, “I’ve lost the sex goddess in me.” No, that’s not true. You haven’t lost her. She’s still there. She may have been pushed to the background, but she’s still there, inside you.


You used to want to have sex, and lots of it, in the past, with that special someone. But nowadays, you find a whole lot of other things to be more appealing. One of the main reasons why women don’t want to have sex like they used to, is simply because they don’t feel as sexy as they used to. Feeling sexy is not something you can turn on and off at will. It takes work. It takes setting an intention. Most women have to transition between being a mother; an employee, or a boss;a homemaker; into a seductive being, and it doesn’t happen with the snap of a finger. It does take work.

intimacy feel desirable

Here are some tips that can help you get sexy back:


Change the way you think about sex

A lot of women view sex as a chore. They view it as something they give and the other person receives. Once you view sex as a treat for you, you can tune into other sensual treats in your daily life. It will open you up to feeling sexier and more attractive.

Remember the last great sex experience

You may be having a busy day, but take just about five minutes for yourself, and replay in your mind the last great sexual encounter, in order to whet your appetite.  Think about how it made you feel. Think about the pleasure you experienced, and how you want to feel this way again.

Throw away those lingerie catalogues

Society has ingrained in our mind a new standard for sexiness; it’s one that no real woman can live up to. Comparing yourself to unrealistic body ideals (which are often Photoshopped) is the fastest way to feel unsexy. Remove these images from your life. When you do see them, remind yourself that these body types are simply unattainable. Yours is sexy, just the way you are.

sexy prom dresses

Dress sexy

According to Sari Locker of The Complete Idiot’s Guide to Amazing Sex, wearing sweats all the time won’t make you feel desirable. You may feel comfortable, but sometimes, comfort isn’t the only thing that matters. You don’t have to wear leather panties and boots to bed, but you can buy clothes that make you feel sexy.


There’s no easy way around it. There are a number of reasons why you should exercise, such as losing weight, improving your cardiovascular system, and lowering your stress, but one of the best reasons is to boost your sexiness. Sweat releases your endorphins, which gives you a natural high. A recent study form the Journal of Sexual Medicine discovered that women who regularly practice yoga feel sexier. Yoga forges a stronger mind-body connection through meditation, and creates self-confidence.

Accent your best features

What’s the best part of your body? Play up your eyes with a new eyeliner, treat yourself to a new mascara, and try a different lip gloss to pucker up those lips. Debbie Mandel of Turn On Your Inner Light says, “When you feel beautiful, you feel sexy.”

Give yourself a bath

Not that you don’t shower on a regular basis, but creating a bathing ritual at least once a week with lit candles, foaming bath gel, and just submerging yourself in a warm bath, can do amazing things for your inner sex goddess. Elizabeth Lombardo, PhD., of A Happy You: Your Ultimate Prescription for Happiness, tells us how warm suds on your naked body can pump up your sexiness level.








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I'm Rebecca Sparks - Founder of The Daily Guru. I'm also a Self Development Coach,
a Speaker and a Podcaster. 

What drives me most in life is a fascination & curiosity with how we can make the most of our short time here on this planet.  How do we make our lives feel meaningful? How can we make life feel fulfilling?  And how can we turn these elements into a lifestyle? 

My mission is to help women explore these topics and to design a life that taps into all of their essentials.

more about me

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