Emotional+Wellbeing

WHY BEING NEGATIVE IS GOOD FOR YOU

Feb 27

Written By

George Lizos

Screen Shot 2018 09 17 at 8.53.09 am

I do a lot of my spiritual life coaching research by watching TV Series.

I love observing unhealthy, damaged characters grow through the seasons and it’s so satisfying when I see them find their happy ending. Although staged, life on TV is a heightened representation of reality. It brings out nuances of people’s personalities that would remain unnoticed in real life.

In every single show I watch, I have noticed that crying is frowned upon. In the same way, real, negative human emotions are brushed under the carpet in an attempt to ‘clear the air’. Of course, as the unexpressed negativity builds up, the character eventually explodes into a tantrum and we get the drama we signed up for. Despite TV heightening the experience, the specific issue is pretty damn accurate.

How many times have you been told that ‘big girls don’t cry’? And have you noticed how uncomfortable people around you get when you share something vulnerable with them? The bottom line is, we perceive negativity as something negative (an oxymoron, but true!), but when handled with care, it’s the most positive thing that can happen to us.

All a negative emotion wants is to be heard. Once it is heard, it completely loses its power.

I always applaud people when they cry and I encourage them to do it more often. I even invented processes to encourage crying because I understand how negative emotions really work. I want you to visualise a negative emotion being a glassful of water. The more you suppress the expression of that emotion, the more the glass fills up until eventually it overfills and you get the explosive tantrum you’re familiar with from TV (and real life for that matter!) On the other hand, when you feel, talk about and cry out the negative emotion, you consciously empty the glass.

But here’s the catch.

Once you empty that glass, you’re faced with a choice: You can either choose to move up the emotional scale to a more positive emotion, or you can go back and refill the glass by telling the same old story. It is this slippery slope that most people are afraid of and opt instead choose denial, but when you know what you’re doing with your negative emotions, there’s nothing to fear.

 

My Crying Technique

With this understanding in mind, you can go on and cry your heart out to a good friend or two. It’s always a good idea to only do so with a few people who genuinely care about you and avoid oversharing with strangers and acquaintances that won’t understand what you’re doing, or where you’re coming from.

If you choose to do this alone, then my crying technique is a safe, powerful way to go about it. All that you’ll need is a mirror and your willingness to be real with yourself:

1 min
Look into your eyes in the mirror for ten minutes. This may sound fickle and simplistic, but it’s harder than it sounds. In the first few minutes your ego will mock the entire process and urge you to give up. Eventually, its power will dissipate and its walls will crumble, and you’ll be able to access your soul. And then all hell will break loose!

2 min

The few minutes after you’ve cried your heart out are the most important in moving up the emotional scale. Instead of ending the session feeling defeated, choose to see the positive side. Turn your strife into tenacity, find the blessing behind the obstacle and literally talk yourself into a better-feeling state. This will be surprisingly easy to do because having cried the past negative emotion out, you’ve exhausted its power and you’ll naturally gravitate towards a more positive one.

 

To learn more about George visit www.georgelizos.com

Share this:
Negativity min
Essentials of a fulfilling life

What are the Unexpected Essentials for a fulfilling life?  Do you know what the ‘essentials’ are in life so that you can live a fulfilling lifestyle?  Firstly let’s agree that fulfilment and happiness are subjective.  They are a state of mind—on how we feel about ourselves and our life. In this sense, anything we do […]

The 18 Unexpected Essentials for a fulfilling life

Emotional+Wellbeing

read more
Stress tips

Stress is a common emotion that most people will feel at some point in their lives. From the stress of exams as a teenager to the stress of planning a wedding, there are typical life events and moments in life that most people will experience. While stress is common, it’s also an emotional state that […]

9 Stress Busting Tips For The Super Stressed Out!

Emotional+Wellbeing

read more
More Fulfilment

What does it take to find more fulfilment in our day-to-day lives? There are essential elements that help us create a meaningful life.  Today I’d like to talk to you about one non-negotiable way to living a meaningful life and why its so important.   And this element is called…. Fun – is essential!   […]

How To Find More Fulfilment In Your Day-To-Day Life

Emotional+Wellbeing

read more
self esteem

Raising children to have healthy levels of Self Esteem is no small task in this day-and-age.   If this topic gets you feeling quite overwhelmed as a parent, don’t worry, you’re not alone. That’s why we wanted to share some helpful self esteem questions you can discuss with your children. To help give you a starting […]

21 Self Esteem Questions to Boost Your Child’s Self Worth

Emotional+Wellbeing

read more
Journal Prompts

A hugely valuable personal growth tool is the use of Journal Prompts. Bringing awareness to our most common thoughts and consciously choosing to reprioritize, refocus, and redirect these thoughts, can have the most profound impact on our life and emotional wellbeing – especially during these challenging times of late. However, at times, journalling can feel […]

50 Easy Journal Prompts For Self-Discovery

Emotional+Wellbeing

read more
A Guide To Understanding The Sensitive Man

  Today we want to discuss the Sensitive man… Recently we explored the pros and cons of being a highly sensitive person (HSP)— a term coined by Dr Elaine Aron in the 90’s, which basically means you feel all of the feelings. Someone who is sensitive to, well, just about everything. Sights. Sounds. Smells. Vibes. A huge number […]

A Guide To Understanding The Sensitive Man

Emotional+Wellbeing

read more
Essentials of a fulfilling life

What are the Unexpected Essentials for a fulfilling life?  Do you know what the ‘essentials’ are in life so that you can live a fulfilling lifestyle?  Firstly let’s agree that fulfilment and happiness are subjective.  They are a state of mind—on how we feel about ourselves and our life. In this sense, anything we do […]

The 18 Unexpected Essentials for a fulfilling life

Personal Growth

read more
Ultimate Reading list

This is our Ultimate Reading list  – for those who are deeply interested in Self Development and on-going growth in their life. These books are real game changers! We often get asked what are some of the best books we have read in various categories based on many the hours of reading and research we […]

The Ultimate Reading List for those who love Self Development

Personal Growth

read more
Design your day

How to Design Your Day

The Surprising Way To Design Your Day

Personal Growth

read more
Embracing Rhythms Over Resolutions

New Year Resolutions… We have made it to 2021! Well done. Last year was anything but easy. 2020 presented us all with challenges, abrupt change, and transitions, amongst many other things, and you made it through. As you reflect on the last year, there are things you may want to leave behind, while there may […]

Embracing Rhythms Over Resolutions

Personal Growth

read more
evan phillip 268078 unsplash scaled

Think ahead to 10 years from now, where will you be….? Have no clue? Not quite sure at all? That’s ok. Like a fortune-teller with her crystal ball in hand, you too can look into your future now and see the life you are manifesting. Here’s how you can quite simply predict where you will […]

Where Will You Be 10 Years From Now?

Personal Growth

read more
21 min

  When life gets busy or you find that one area of your life is demanding a lot of your time and energy, it’s easy to find yourself out of balance and not paying enough attention to what’s most important in your life. While you need to have drive and direction, too much can create […]

Finding Balance In Our Busy Lives

Personal Growth

read more

I'm Rebecca Sparks - Founder of The Daily Guru. I'm also a Self Development Coach,
a Speaker and a Podcaster. 

What drives me most in life is a fascination & curiosity with how we can make the most of our short time here on this planet.  How do we make our lives feel meaningful? How can we make life feel fulfilling?  And how can we turn these elements into a lifestyle? 

My mission is to help women explore these topics and to design a life that taps into all of their essentials.

more about me

Hey there!

oh la la!

"It's like DG is reading my mind! Every time I get an email from them, its exactly what I needed to hear."
- Jennifer West

Join the gang!

We've built a HUGE library of Growth & Wellbeing Resources for women just like you.  And we save all the best bits for our PenPals
 (AKA the Newsletter crew!)

So save yourself from unbearable FOMO and sign up below 

SIGN UP

FOR OUR WEEKLY NEWSLETTER

Get Our Free Guide to Kicking Ass on Social

Taiyaki occupy farm-to-table swag fashion axe four loko. Church-key palo santo selvage helvetica iceland tumblr.

GET THAT DOWNLOAD

Email

Name

"Margi's guide was kick-ass indeed and quite literally changed how I show up on social." - Jen Olmstead

oh la la!

Home
About
CONTACT
ARTICLES

THE DAILY GURU

follow along 
on Instagram:

SEND ME A NOTE >

GET ON THE LIST >

@TheDailyGUru >

© MArgarita Coaching 2020  |  Design by Tonic  |  Photos by social squares & Unsplash

podcast